What I recommend to parents dealing with difficult behaviors in their children:

bodylanguageParent’s often come to me with problems getting their children to stop a behavior, or help getting them to to simply behave.  As many times as I’ve recommended the following program,  I should be being paid by Dr. Phehan LOL. But I’m not.  Let me say that to begin with.  I’m not being paid to endorse this program.  I just know I’ve used it myself.  I’ve helped parents I work with learn to use it as well.

I believe in this program, 123 Magic is one of the the simplest, and easiest (but not so easy) program to use and can be started at early ages or even later ages.  I found out about this program when I was a case manager doing in-home work with families.  Basically, it consists of less talk from parents  -remember the old Peanuts cartoons with Charlie Brown in the class room?  We always heard only “blah blah blah” from the teacher.  Well, a lot of times, as parents, we simply talk to much.  We give too much information when less is needed.  You know the saying…. “less is more”. Your kids tune you out after so long.  They can only keep their attention for so long, especially when they feel they are being chastised.  Don’t you?  Ever have a boss getting onto you for something you did wrong?  Sure you listened to him/her, but eventually, in your mind, you start drifting away or maybe even defending yourself in your mind.  Either way, you’ve sort of tuned out.  Your kids do this too.  They are only going to listen so long to scolding.

I used this with my own children as they were growing up.   So I know it works.  The problem is that parents become to complacent and go back to their old habits.  I was often guilty of this.  When I was using it correctly my home was less stressed and more peaceful, and there were less arguments.  Eventually my eldest (a teenager at the time) would snicker to himself when I started counting…. BUT he was usually walking toward his room, away from whatever the conflict or problem was at that moment. It works.  But parents have to be consistent.  That’s the key.

Want to know more about it?  Here is the Youtube link for a 2 minute clip of the program by Dr. Phelan.  You can find the CD or book, or even workbook on Amazon.  Oh, and there is an app for the IPhone as well.

Anyway, that’s my recommendation to try if you find yourself stressing out, yelling or doing more punishing of your children than you would like.  But remember…..Constancy, constancy, constancy.   drama (1024x793)

 

 

 

 

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About Childs Play Counseling Services

No family is without the occasional frustration or challenge but when issues are interfering with daily activities or causing chaos within the home it may be time to look for help. Child's Play Counseling Services offers full service mental health counseling and therapy for adults, children, adolescents, and families in Covington County, Alabama. I offer therapy for a variety of issues not limited to ADHD, behavior problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety, school problems, anger management, low self esteem, eating disorders, family issues relating to divorce and separation within the family. I have been helping children, adults and families heal, and lead healthy lives for over 15 years in a safe, confidential, and nonjudgmental environment. I can help you. Call 334-222-7094 to schedule your appointment. I am licensed in Alabama as well as Florida and in addition to being a licensed counselor, I am also licensed in both states to offer supervision for those wishing to obtain their licenses in Alabama, Florida or certification in Play Therapy. I often teach parenting classes and training and conduct workshops to other professionals in the field of mental health. The topics I present on include issues of concern for parents, as well as counseling techniques to professionals. I specialize in Play Therapy and am always happy to conduct workshops to other professionals on the benefits of play therapy. If you would like me speak at your event or offer a workshop in your area, please contact me and we can set something up.
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